Even bicyclist-on-bicyclist crime breaks my heart, and my desire to eliminate your vile hobby is as much for your own good as my own. But I can’t stop trying. I know not, dear reader.
The revenue from adverts helps to fund our site. But I just can’t stop myself from trying to help these poor bastards. I cannot entertain the idea that the town that fundamentally shaped me as a human being has turned its back on me so completely. Now consider that before a boxing match, there is a weigh-in to make sure that both boxers are below the agreed-upon weight. At about 5pm on December 20 a First York Bus with passengers on board was travelling over Ouse Bridge when a passing cyclist punched a window and smashed it. But that said, the ol’ “put a bag of dog poop on the neighbor’s doorstep and light it on fire” gag is a classic! And if you don’t want to risk getting blown the fuck off your dipshit bicycle, you don’t pedal your ass past an active jetway. And don’t get me wrong. Shit, there’s a joke in there somewhere, come back to me, I’ll think of it.
Cyclists are so earnest, so serious and so humourless about their chosen calling that it is almost one’s duty to pick on them. This horrible loaf of sadness and shame simply cannot be what bicyclists eat. Consider boxing. NOT ME! I didn’t know how much 150g was because I live in America, the greatest country on earth, so I looked it up. I found myself surrounded by all types of anxious looking cyclists.
And hey, look, I’m not here to slander maple syrup. Where is the satisfaction in this life, I ask you? Anyway, what makes the gag a classic is its simplicity. I went into it hoping to learn a little more about what keeps them going (through red lights). 70g strong white bread flour
It’s true that there are plenty of streets where there just isn’t a ton of shoulder space for bicyclists to ride. You’ve got to ask yourself a very simple question. There are only, like, four steps: You get to light something on fire, and your neighbor gets their feet mashed into a pile poop. Sometimes you deserve a wear-sweatpants-and-play-video-games-on-the-couch- sort of day. From $1.50. The bicyclists flies right on through a red light and almost gets sideswiped by a regular, law-abiding citizen. It’s amazing. If you don’t want to risk getting wet, you don’t hang around the pool. I hate that sparkley rich girl bumper sticker “Spoiled”… I told my husband to put that bumper sticker on the back of his beat up 89 Buick… Then that bumper sticker would be cool! But hell came to town today, my friends. Stories like this really drive the point home. They don’t care for laws, they don’t care for the safety of others, so why should they care about being covered in a few pesky spider webs? You probably think I’m going to say it’s bad to go around lighting fires on doorsteps. The gust knocked [name], who was riding a recumbent bike, to the ground “and spun his body and bike 180 degrees and onto the pavement of Highway 227 into the southbound lane of traffic, causing him severe injuries and damaging his bike and property,” the lawsuit reads.
news.com.au — Australia’s leading news site. Stories about bicyclists committing murder. [Leinster Leader] Delays were reported to Maynooth rail lines this afternoon, after a cyclist caused damage to a level crossing at Coolmine. Frankly, the words “malt loaf” made me gag a little right off the bat, but I decided to be open minded.
I’m just looking for answers. Out loud. I didn’t even get to include the part of the article where the moron they arrested responded to every question with the name of bicyclist gang group, a group which claims it’s “just looking to put negativity aside and ride.” Sweet job, guys! GRIFF RHYS JONES: I have a footpath running through my garden. Where is the pride? “Numerous vehicles were activating their horns and yelling out of the windows.”, “The detail officer was walking on the sidewalk from the front of the building and about to turn the corner when he was nearly struck by one of the males on a bike,” police said. I thought we all agreed that prunes were a punchline, not a food. Well, okay, granted, I’ve never done it. This guy, he didn’t care. MADISON, Ind. Sure, this lady seems nice. However there appears to be two types of cyclists, those who just want to get around, and those who are living out some sponsored professional athlete fantasy. I would also be remiss if I didn’t call attention to the fact that this guy isn’t just riding any old bicycle. Go ahead and email me right here: Bicyclists are the worst people in the world. No matter how pointless it may be in the end, no matter how sad and terrible the ramifications, they just can’t help themselves. Is it worth it to attract more bicyclists to your town, prancing about in their Tour de France cosplay outfits, breezing through red lights with reckless abandon, and ultimately ensuring that your daily commute involves at least 20 minutes stuck behind four bicyclists spread out horizontally across the road moving at a leisurely 3 MPH? In a lot of cases, I’m even willing to meet bicyclists halfway. I refuse to believe that this is what has become of my hometown. No one in the world likes prunes this much. Ensure that your progeny live on. The only possible conclusion that can be drawn here is that bicyclists are not human anymore. Like this site? I don’t know much about mass and acceleration and relative speed. The sugar and dried fruit provide a speedy dose of energy, but you also get slow-release carbohydrates from the sweet potato that are perfect for endurance.
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