I’ve been ghosted so many times, I used to tell guys that the only thing I expected of them was for them to let me know when the relationship was over (of course, they never did). I feel terrible…. Even better, breaking things off officially gives you a chance to end on a kinder note and wish each other well–rather than to leave a bad taste in someone’s mouth and have them think (and rightly so) that you’re being a selfish jerk.
Challenge him, see if he will communicate. This self-questioning is the result of basic psychological systems that are in place to monitor one’s social standing and relay that information back to the person via feelings of self-worth and self-esteem.
It wasn’t because I cared about this person to the same extent I loved my ex, it was more because I just felt so confused and worthless, like I wasn’t even good enough for a simple text message. I’ve been seeing a woman for pretty consistent amount of time over this last month. But to just ignore simple waves and texts? Recently I went out on a casual coffee date with someone who never called again and I’ve felt pretty terrible ever since, but then I realised, I’ve met other men who have pursued me after meeting at a bar or whatever and I wasn’t terribly interested in them, so l just let communication peeter out, hoping they got the message… And I never thought about what feelings they may have a experienced as a result, I just moved on… So maybe this guy didnt realik how hurt I felt, he just lacked interest and moved on. We didn't even have the least bit of an argument and then I was ghosted. Sending you love from London xo, I was recently dating a guy for about three months, and we had a fabulous time together.
He would disappear for months at the time because, according to him, he had his own issues that he wanted to solve them alone. I don’t understand how it just changed so quickly within like 3 days. More and more people suffer the consequences. I’m in week 3 of no contact after 2 glorious months of the fairy-tale beginnings of a new relationship – meeting of the friends, airport pickups, family introductions, being chucked out of more than one pub as it was closing and we were still nattering away, full of conversation and laughter – you name it, it happened. We were both tired of games, we were tired of being let down.
If you do run into him, I’d act kindly and respectfully, but I’d keep it short. Thank you for your article. Ohmygoodness, this has happened to me way more often that I’d like, but one time really confused me – I was traveling, met a guy who I got along with SO well, was hoping (and was thinking) something ~romantic~ would happen, it didn’t, but ok wtv, we live so far that maybe he didn’t want to get into the whole having to say bye/long distance part, we still became good friends so I figured we would at least stay friends.
I know i will eventually feel better but the hurt is pretty rough. Be very glad!
The mental and emotional damage this does to people is mind blowing, and extremely hurtful. He was always very complimentary and couldn’t believe how great I was. I also get the feeling there might be more gentleman reading this block than meets the eye … Happy Love Hunting y’all and keep those heads high! Remedy Health Media & PsyCom do not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. I was not actually ghosted in the sense of it I have gained here. Sometimes ghosting is referred to as "the ultimate form of the silent treatment" which is a form of abuse mental health professionals view as a form of emotional cruelty. Your 3rd ghosting story reminded me so much of what I’m going through right now.. Anyway, thanks again. Ghosting leaves the other party with more questions than anything else. A simple, I’m sorry I’m not ready to date right now-is enough! Know that if you are someone who treats people with respect and integrity then the ghoster simply wasn’t on your wavelength and someone better is coming your way, as long as you keep your heart open and your focus forward.
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