The conversation on mental health amongst young women is sparse on-screen, and that's why Euphoria was refreshing for me, even if it was also destabilizing.
Granted, I didn't realize until later what waxing and waning implied. https://soundcloud.com/delasola/euphoria, New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. The amount of abject terror I hold in my chest every day can be isolating; it's hard to not feel alone when I'm sobbing in a fetal position on my couch, begging God, or the moon, or an alien overlordâwhoever is responsible up thereâto make me normal, and to give me the mental tools that it seems like most people were naturally equipped with in order to deal with existing as a person in a body.
The other thing about depression is it kind of collapses time.
Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, https://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/view_episode_scripts.php?tv-show=euphoria-2019&episode=s01e07.
I'm anxious. I've never been able to put it into words before, This episode/ whole tv series is by far my favorite. Sure, there are rare positive and accurate portrayals of people with mental health issues, like in Silver Linings Playbook, or in The Skeleton Twins. At least, sheâand Euphoriaâcan get us talking to each other, get the dialogue started.
Sign up for our newsletter. We "give it life again.". So you find yourself trying to … There's no limit to what I've tried and what I will try in search of a nanosecond of peace in my chest. That these feelings were fixed and constant and would never end for the rest of my life.
Apparently, that's a sentiment I share with Rue, the protagonist of HBO's new series Euphoria, who is played to perfection by Zendaya. Amazingly on point. That's sus!
Rue made me feel less alone.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. HBO's Euphoria: A group of high school students try to discover their own identities while dealing with drugs, trauma, love, and social media. Here's a rough copy of the monologue, I did my best to compress it!
And the hardest part of that quest for silence is the knowledge that, with peace, comes an inevitable return to noise and monotony of anxiety. Check it out!
), "I was once happy, content, sloshing around in my own primordial pool," Rue says in the pilot's opening narration. In particular, the following bit of Rue's narrationâdelivered in a perfectly distressing monotone by Zendayaâplaying over a scene in which she experiences a panic attack, brought me to tears: This monologue led to a scene of Rue getting high, experiencing her two seconds of "euphoria," and a new, similarly heartbreaking narrative stunner: I mean, fuck.
It's called WAX AND WANE! This isn't my experience: I don't use drugs like Rue, and I'm privileged to have never suffered from addiction. But slowly, your brain begins to erase every memory that ever brought you joy. Being alive is hard. These ideas of mine percolate the mind Trickle down my spine Swarm the belly, swelling to a blaze That's where the pain comes in Like a second skeleton Trying to fit beneath the skin I can't fit the feelings in Oh, every single night's alight With my brain What'd I say to her, why'd I say to her What does she think of me That I'm not what I ought to be That I'm what I try not to be It's got to be somebody else's fault I can't get caught If what I am is what I am 'cause I does what I does Then brother, get back 'Cause my breast's gonna bust open The rib is the shell and the heart is a yolk And I just made a meal for us both to choke on Every single night's a fight with my brain I just want to Feel everything I just want to Feel everything, Read more: https://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/view_episode_scripts.php?tv-show=euphoria-2019&episode=s01e07, That is the absolute best description of depression I've ever seen. It always confused me, because I didn't really know what it meant.
But it did sound a lot calmer than the way I would describe it.
She suffers so often and so fervently from anxiety and panic attacks, that she despairingly tries to allay it through the use of drugs.
(Trigger … I didn't ask to be born, is something I often think in my darkest momentsâor at least, the ones where I'm feeling playful enough to joke about my own nonconsensual mortality. That monologue told us everything we needed to know about Rue and her afflictions: This is a depressed person. So you find yourself trying to remember the things that made you happy.
Please see the link below for the full script, many thanks to kodapup2019 for the find. Want more stories like this? But typically, it's glazed over. "Then one day, for reasons beyond my control, I was repeatedly crushed over and over by the cruel cervix of my mother, Leslie. Upon watching the first two episodes, I was actually happyâand by "happy," I mean devastatedâto see the things I feel and endure mirrored on my smudgy laptop screen.
The show is imperfect, but it speaks to what it means to feel unstable.
Shut Up, Brain is a column by Jill Gutowitz in which she looks at everything from pop culture phenomena to the quirks of interpersonal relationships through the lens of someone who lives with anxiety. Now, I have to admit, I was initially skeptical of Euphoria; it's a dark series about the toils of modern teenage girlhoodâwhich was created by a man. Apparently, that's a sentiment I share with Rue, the protagonist of HBO's new series Euphoria, who is played to perfection by Zendaya. Maybe she can make other people feel more alone. And will only continue to be this way. And when I panic, and I lose that battle to the unrelenting scream of anxiety, I often wish I could time travelânot back to middle school, not to my childhood, not even to when I was a baby (although being swaddled sounds tight as hell)âbut back to the womb. (Trigger warnings: anxiety, addiction. Suddenly, you find your whole days blending together to create one endless and suffocating loop. This is not the kind of thing we see often on film and TV. Like, all the time. Suddenly, you find your whole days blending together to create one endless and suffocating loop. But it also gave her anxiety because it meant that in the good times, there would be bad times. That passage and the first couple episodes of this show have fucked me up, which is why I wanted to share it, because the profundity with which it fucked me up means something; Euphoria struck a chord in me that didn't want to be struck, but that needed to be. And eventually, all you can think about is how life has always been this way.
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